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The Latest Jokes - Page 140
What do you a blonde inbetween two brunettes? An interpreter.
In a world without frontiers, who needs Windows and Gates?
There are 3 people standing in front of a magic mirror. The mirror gives you anything you desire if you tell it the truth, but you disappear if you lie. The first person to talk to the mirror was a very fat brunette. She walked up to the mirror and said "I think I am the thinnest person in the world." and poof, the mirror gobbled her up. The next person to come up to the mirror was a very ugly red head. She told the mirror "I think I am the prettiest person in the world" and poof, the mirror gobbled her up. Lastly came the blonde. She walked up to the mirror and said "I think..." and poof, the mirror gobbled her up.
what is the longest word in the world? Smiles
a tourtoise gets mugged by two snails. he goes to a police station to give a report, when asked what happed he replied "i don't no it all happed so fast.
Your epidermis is showing
I laid on my twin size wondering where my brother was
A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After the
> checkup, the doctor took the wife aside and said, "Your husband is
> suffering from severe, long-term stress and it's affecting his
> cardiovascular system. He's a good candidate for either a heart attack
> or a stroke. If you don't do the following four things, your husband
> will surely die".
>
> "First, each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast and send him off to
> work in a good mood."
>
> "Second, at lunch time, make him a warm, nutritious meal and put him
> in a good frame of mind before he goes back to work."
>
> "Third, for dinner, fix an especially nice meal, and don't burden him
> with household chores."
>
> "Fourth, and most important for invigorating him and relieving stress,
> have sex with him several times a week and satisfy his every whim in
> bed."
>
> On the way home in the car, the husband turned to his wife and asked,
> "So, I saw the doctor talking to you and he sure seemed serious. What
> did he tell you?"
>
> "You're going to die," she replied.
what do you get when you cross a pig with a cigarrette?
smokey bacon
what is a pirates favorite subject in school? arrrrrrrrrrrrrt!
Enter some text (such as a joke, word, or phrase) and find out if Google laughs: Random Joke: my mother taught me to never lie and i havent slept on a bed since Google laughed, and the joke's funniness percentage is: 80.6542% The joke's popularity is: 5.029
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