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The Latest Jokes - Page 162
Why does a moon rock taste better then an earth rock? Because it's a little meteor.
a guy walks into ab bar the next day he sais my head hurts.
want to hear a dirty joke? the pig fell in the mud.
how many jewish mothers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? no it's all right. I'll just sit here in the dark.
Why did the kid through margarine out the window? He wanted to see a butterfly.
A priest and a rabbin on a train. The priest eats a ham sandwich and asks the rabbin: Whould you like some? The rabbin answers: Well, no! You know, I can't eat pork... The priest: Too bad, you don't know what you're missing!!! They arrived to destination. The rabbin asks the priest: Is your wife coming to get you? The priest answers: Well no, I'm not allowed to be married... And the rabbin: Too bad for you, you don't know what you're missing!!!
The District Attorney stared at the jury, unable to believe its verdict.
Bitterly he asked, "What possible excuse could you have for acquitting this man?"
The foreman answered, "Insanity."
The D.A.: "All twelve of you?"
Look, a distraction!
Tommy and Bobby were the best of friends. They were on the same baseball team. Tommy was a pitcher, and Bobby played third base. They agreed that when one of them died, they would come back and tell the other if there was baseball in Heaven. Many years later, Bobby died first. One day, Tommy walked into his sitting room and the was Bobby's ghost, sitting on a chair. Tommy was delighted to see him and asked if there was baseball in heaven. Bobby replied, "Oh yes! I play third base, just like I used to! But there is some bad news." "What?" Tommy asked. Bobby said, "You're scheduled to pitch tomorrow."
What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs
Enter some text (such as a joke, word, or phrase) and find out if Google laughs: Random Joke: A man went to his dentist because he feels something wrong in his mouth. The dentist examines him and says, "that new upper plate I put in for you six months ago is eroding. What have you been eating?" The man replies, "all I can think of is that about four months ago my wife made some asparagus and put some stuff on it that was delicious...Hollandaise sauce. I loved it so much I now put it on everything --- meat, toast, fish, vegtables, everything." "Well," says the dentist, "that's probably the problem. Hollandaise sauce is made with lots of lemon juice, which is highly corrosive. It's eaten away your upper plate. I'll make you a new plate, and this time use chrome." "Why chrome?" asks the patient. To which the dentist replies, "It's simple. Everyone knows that there's no plate like chrome for the Hollandaise!" Google laughed, and the joke's funniness percentage is: 78.8073% The joke's popularity is: 3.037
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